The Inside Care

Someone said "I care about you"
And I reacted "Thank you. I love you."
But then again, I kept questioning myself "Do they really care about me?"
I don't need any empty words to express your empty feeling to me... You said you care about me, but I doubted it. I'm sorry, it's not because I don't want to be taken care... It's just I lost my confidence... It's just I'm getting exhausted with fake care... I was always neglected and I'm used to be like that... That I don't know what 'care' is... That I don't get what 'care' is... That I keep looking for 'care' itself... I always demand care from the people that I want to take care of me... However, I never really feel their care to me... It may be because I am too demanding... Am I a troublesome for demanding care from the people I want?
Later on, it doesn't matter for me whether they care about me or not... I already look for care that I want outside that area... But then again, It is not enough... All those cares from other people or others are just outside care... I want those cares inside, I want get those cares from the inside... Can I get that? Can I reach your care?

-a super mini letter for mom and dad-

--ultrautogia--