Long time no see... I've been so busy doing something unnecessary... Oh yes, I'm in a big trouble in terms of priority scale... sigh... long sigh... long long sigh...
Some of my friends have already departed from university or I might say they already graduated or will graduate soon... They leave me behind... Oh no, it is actually not like that... I let them leave before me... Yes, I don't do any strong efforts, I don't struggle harder than them, No, I don't and I don't know why...
But, it doesn't mean that I have no worries with something like that... I have big worries, it troubles me all the time... It pressed me down day by day...
It's like.....
I want to give up
I want to give in
But, I am not allowed to do that...
I force myself to smile or laugh, to hide my true feelings, to conceal my true feelings...
I am running away... Escaping myself from one place to others...
I'm like a fool...
Yet, I know, I will never always run away... I will never always escape...
I am too afraid in facing reality...
Such a coward...
I laugh a lot these days... I bet this is the form of my stress and pressed feelings...
I don't know... It's like I laugh at my self, I laugh at my life...
I don't know where it will end or when it will end...
This is all I want to share...
Not really necessary, huh?
HAHAHAHAHAHA ~ ! Look ! I'm laughing again !!
-ultrautogia-
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